May 24, 2013

johnettelopuszynskibakes:

May 19, 2013 - We are having a big Memorial Day family celebration to celebrate Drew’s 10th birthday…

Happy Memorial Day, U.S.-based Tumblr-Pals! Hope everyone has a safe and fun weekend. As my lovely betrothed mentions above, we’re hosting a birthday party for Son #2, and at his party I plan to:

  • Eat seven hotdogs
  • Drink six-point-two cans of sodie pop
  • Cake. Chips and dip. Cake and dip. Chips and cake. Dip and dip.
  • Take any leftovers from that red and blue icing, smear it all over myself to fashion a Superman suit, climb up onto my roof, and recreate moments from the Man of Steel trailer for my family and friends. No need to thank me, Warner Bros.!
  • IT WILL BE EPIC.

May 13, 2013
dennys:

Could you finish an entire Lumberjack Slam?

My family visited our neighborhood Denny’s this weekend past.
My 12-year-old son did, in fact, finish an entire Lumberjack Slam.
He is not - so far as I know - an actual lumberjack.
I am hoping that Denny’s sends him a plaid shirt.
For he has earned it.

dennys:

Could you finish an entire Lumberjack Slam?

My family visited our neighborhood Denny’s this weekend past.

My 12-year-old son did, in fact, finish an entire Lumberjack Slam.

He is not - so far as I know - an actual lumberjack.

I am hoping that Denny’s sends him a plaid shirt.

For he has earned it.

May 10, 2013

johnettelopuszynskibakes:

May 9, 2013 - I like to take Jack’s piano teacher treats whenever I can. She is a real firecracker…

Here are the reasons - although not all of the reasons - why you should click over to my wife’s Tumblr and start following her immediately:

  • She posts amazing pictures of baked goods
  • THAT SHE MADE WITH HER OWN TWO PERFECT HANDS
  • It’s Mother’s Day weekend and she posted these cute little Mother’s Day cupcakes and she’s my kids’ mom and they are awesome and she’s really the most amazing person alive
  • She tells great stories about how and why she bakes what she does and what it means in the greater context of life, the universe and everything
  • My oldest son has started taking pictures for her site and he’s absurdly good at it
  • She will not let me go out to the movies anymore until her followers increase at the rate of 15% weekly

Please. Won’t you just think about the movies? How am I going to get to the movies unless you help?

April 29, 2013
My 2013 Movies: 42 (2013, at the theatre)
You’ll find nothing extraordinary here; you’ll find no surprises or conflicts that are more than skin-deep. You’ll find serviceable, occasionally community-theatre-like performances*, a thoughtful yet superficial biopic treatment that neither discourages discourse nor provokes it.
But what you will find is a rather perfect movie to bring two** of your sons to so that they can learn something rather simple and meaningful about the world, and the sport they love.
And that made it worth it.
(image via Rope of Silicon)
* 2013 Best Performance by Outrageously Furry Eyebrows: Harrison Ford.
** if you’ve been paying attention, you may remember that I have three sons. My oldest 1) was performing in a choral concert when the rest of us went to the movies and - more importantly - 2) could not possibly be dragged to a movie about baseball.

My 2013 Movies: 42 (2013, at the theatre)

You’ll find nothing extraordinary here; you’ll find no surprises or conflicts that are more than skin-deep. You’ll find serviceable, occasionally community-theatre-like performances*, a thoughtful yet superficial biopic treatment that neither discourages discourse nor provokes it.

But what you will find is a rather perfect movie to bring two** of your sons to so that they can learn something rather simple and meaningful about the world, and the sport they love.

And that made it worth it.

(image via Rope of Silicon)

* 2013 Best Performance by Outrageously Furry Eyebrows: Harrison Ford.

** if you’ve been paying attention, you may remember that I have three sons. My oldest 1) was performing in a choral concert when the rest of us went to the movies and - more importantly - 2) could not possibly be dragged to a movie about baseball.

April 12, 2013
I received this in the mail from my parents over a month ago and - naturally - immediately submitted it to The “Blog” of “Unnecessary” Quotation Marks. I don’t know if they’ll run it there or not, but it gives me a chuckle every time I see it here in my Drafts folder, so I figured I might as well share it with you.
Thanks, “mom” and “dad”.

I received this in the mail from my parents over a month ago and - naturally - immediately submitted it to The “Blog” of “Unnecessary” Quotation Marks. I don’t know if they’ll run it there or not, but it gives me a chuckle every time I see it here in my Drafts folder, so I figured I might as well share it with you.

Thanks, “mom” and “dad”.

March 14, 2013
johnettelopuszynskibakes:

This is Sam’s spectacular St. Patrick’s Day cake…

St. Patrick’s day has come early over at my wife’s tasty baking blog, where you will learn the answer to the question “Why does my youngest don a superhero mask to decorate a cake?”
(spoiler alert: because awesomeness)
And before you ask, no: That is not Halle Berry’s hair. It’s Sam’s, it’s real, and it’s spectacular.

johnettelopuszynskibakes:

This is Sam’s spectacular St. Patrick’s Day cake…

St. Patrick’s day has come early over at my wife’s tasty baking blog, where you will learn the answer to the question “Why does my youngest don a superhero mask to decorate a cake?”

(spoiler alert: because awesomeness)

And before you ask, no: That is not Halle Berry’s hair. It’s Sam’s, it’s real, and it’s spectacular.

February 8, 2013
The amount of peanut M&Ms I’ve already eaten this morning would’ve killed an ordinary man.

February 6, 2013
johnettelopuszynskibakes:

This was my middle son’s Coca-Cola chocolate birthday cake in 2012. For his birthday, we spent a weekend watching Pittsburgh Pirate games at the stadium. I also baked baseball cupcakes for his little league team!

How about everybody give a warm Tumblr welcome to my delightful, beautiful and talented wife Johnette at her new fantastytastic site Johnette Lopuszynski Bakes!
She’s sharing photographs and stories about all the amazing cakes, pies, cookies, cupcakes and more that she’s baking today, yesterday and in the past.
And you can believe me when I tell you: the girl’s got some serious talent.
Just check out the beautiful fish-themed cake she made for a friend’s daughter or the cool blue Star Trek or epic Harry Potter cakes she’s made for our sons.

johnettelopuszynskibakes:

This was my middle son’s Coca-Cola chocolate birthday cake in 2012. For his birthday, we spent a weekend watching Pittsburgh Pirate games at the stadium. I also baked baseball cupcakes for his little league team!

How about everybody give a warm Tumblr welcome to my delightful, beautiful and talented wife Johnette at her new fantastytastic site Johnette Lopuszynski Bakes!

She’s sharing photographs and stories about all the amazing cakes, pies, cookies, cupcakes and more that she’s baking today, yesterday and in the past.

And you can believe me when I tell you: the girl’s got some serious talent.

Just check out the beautiful fish-themed cake she made for a friend’s daughter or the cool blue Star Trek or epic Harry Potter cakes she’s made for our sons.

January 8, 2013
hidingundertrees:


HAPPY NOW, JERKS?!
I only have an hour or so before work, so don’t expect much right away. Also, this is the weirdest place to put a title? That old man is teabagging it!


If I understand correctly, Andrew from hidingundertrees is planning to watch Die Hard for the first time, which is certainly a momentous occasion for any film lover.
I wish him well. Yippie-kai-yay, etc.
And I wanted to add a brief story of the first time I saw Die Hard in the movie theater in July of 1988. I’d stayed at college over the summer because I had a better job there than I would have had at home. I didn’t have high hopes for the movie because Willis was unknown in this kind of film, having only gained popularity from Moonlighting. I didn’t know John McTiernan and certainly didn’t know Alan Rickman. So: low expectations.
I was surprised, however, that the theater was mostly full, and grabbed an aisle seat for myself. A guy came in when the lights were about to go down and asked to climb over me to one of the last vacant seats. It was easier for him to climb over me than the other dozen or so in the rest of the row, so no big deal.
The movie unspooled and thrilled me for every single one of its 132 minutes. It remains to this day one of my all-time favorites not just as an action film par excellence: but of a character study, marital drama and deconstruction of a number of 80s action-hero film tropes.
But that’s beyond my point, which is this:
When the lights came up, I sighed contentedly and looked around, amazed to see that the guy who’d climbed over me was gone.
It’s absolutely unlikely that he climbed over the other dozen people in the row during the course of the movie; to do so would have been silly and illogical.
No, I was next to him, on the aisle. He had to have climbed over me. It’s just that I genuinely had no memory whatsoever of him doing so, and I was shocked in a truly unprecedented way that he wasn’t there.
This was one of those moments where I felt like I’d learned an important lesson about the immersive power of cinema.

hidingundertrees:

HAPPY NOW, JERKS?!

I only have an hour or so before work, so don’t expect much right away. Also, this is the weirdest place to put a title? That old man is teabagging it!

If I understand correctly, Andrew from hidingundertrees is planning to watch Die Hard for the first time, which is certainly a momentous occasion for any film lover.

I wish him well. Yippie-kai-yay, etc.

And I wanted to add a brief story of the first time I saw Die Hard in the movie theater in July of 1988. I’d stayed at college over the summer because I had a better job there than I would have had at home. I didn’t have high hopes for the movie because Willis was unknown in this kind of film, having only gained popularity from Moonlighting. I didn’t know John McTiernan and certainly didn’t know Alan Rickman. So: low expectations.

I was surprised, however, that the theater was mostly full, and grabbed an aisle seat for myself. A guy came in when the lights were about to go down and asked to climb over me to one of the last vacant seats. It was easier for him to climb over me than the other dozen or so in the rest of the row, so no big deal.

The movie unspooled and thrilled me for every single one of its 132 minutes. It remains to this day one of my all-time favorites not just as an action film par excellence: but of a character study, marital drama and deconstruction of a number of 80s action-hero film tropes.

But that’s beyond my point, which is this:

When the lights came up, I sighed contentedly and looked around, amazed to see that the guy who’d climbed over me was gone.

It’s absolutely unlikely that he climbed over the other dozen people in the row during the course of the movie; to do so would have been silly and illogical.

No, I was next to him, on the aisle. He had to have climbed over me. It’s just that I genuinely had no memory whatsoever of him doing so, and I was shocked in a truly unprecedented way that he wasn’t there.

This was one of those moments where I felt like I’d learned an important lesson about the immersive power of cinema.

image

November 14, 2012
My 12-year-old boy and I, in the car, upon hearing a local radio promo:
ME: Oh, that's cool. William Shatner is coming to Pittsburgh to do a one-man show.
HIM: ...
ME: You know, William Shatner?
HIM: ...
ME: Captain Kirk?
HIM: ...
ME: The old one.
HIM: OH.
...
HIM: He's kind of the fat one, right?
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